Benjamin Lerner on Alcohol, Depression and Rediscovering Music

The pianist, composer, rapper, radio host and All Sober all-star says even "picking up the phone" can make all the difference

December 15, 2022
Benjamin Lerner at the piano

Benjamin Lerner is a classically trained pianist and a rapper, a former IV drug user and proud recovery advocate. Sober since 2016, he has written intimate, complex songs about pain, anger, fear, sickness, uncertainty, hope, pride and serenity — the full spectrum of his experiences during addiction, in recovery and in his pursuit of mental well-being.

All Sober readers may know Lerner from his lyrical stylings on “Scars” and “Recovery Is Possible,” but he recently opened up about his alcohol use disorder, his sobriety journey and how he manages mental health challenges like depression and Asperger’s syndrome in recovery, in an interview with Insider.

When Benjamin Lerner — a writer, radio host and recovery advocate with All Sober — had his first beer at age 13, he noticed it dulled his fears, insecurities and inhibitions.

Lerner has Asperger’s syndrome, which he says makes it difficult for him to connect with others.

“I used alcohol to cope with feelings of isolation and sadness,” he says.

Lerner developed an alcohol addiction that continued to escalate throughout his teens and early 20s. He participated in several treatment programs at his family’s urging, but none of them helped. Eventually, at age 24, he decided to get sober for good.

“I couldn’t justify running from my depression and anxiety anymore,” he says.

Lerner stopped drinking while attending an inpatient program in June 2016. Although he continued to experience depression, he says connecting with other people in recovery helped fuel his motivation to stick with sobriety.

He also began channeling his emotions into writing music — a passion he lost sight of during his addiction — and even released an album about his personal experiences called “Clean.”

“Today, I manage my depression by picking up the phone and calling people in my recovery fellowship to ask for help or seeking advice on the All Sober message boards. Being open and honest about my addiction and sobriety is a vital part of my recovery,” he says.

Read the full article at Insider: “5 People Share How Alcohol Worsened Their Depression — And How Sobriety Helped Improve Their Mental Health.”

More Inspiration

Depressed man sitting at wooden table

Subs & Drugs & Rock & Roll, Part 3: 'I'm a Loser (And I'm Not What I Appear To Be)'

Don Fertman reaches bottom as the jelly donut hits the wall. The latest installment of the longtime Subway exec's memoir.

Annie Zimmerman's soberversary cake

The Joy of Baking (Sober)

Two months sober, Annie Zimmerman decided to make cookies. Now, her hobby turned passion yields fulfillment, connection and delicious soberversary cakes. Read the interview!

Don Fertman

Subs & Drugs & Rock & Roll, Part 2: A Day in the Life

Don Fertman woke up one morning 40 years ago and poured himself a drink, as usual. But the future Subway exec didn't know this day would be far from ordinary.

Annie Zimmerman running a marathon

Running Toward Recovery

Seeking purpose in early recovery, Annie Zimmerman rekindled an old fire with distance running — and found it carried her through some of her toughest trials in sober life.

Ben Tuff

Closer to the Shore

On Ben Tuff's third day in inpatient treatment, he had a surprising encounter that would eventually lead him to attempt a grueling 24-mile swim across the Narragansett Bay.

Don Fertman

Subs & Drugs & Rock & Roll, Part 1: With a Little Help From My Friends

Don Fertman, longtime Subway exec, writes about a pivotal moment in his 40 years of sobriety: what happened after he went public about his recovery on "Undercover Boss."

Men hugging at a 12-step recovery meeting

Sober Holiday Tips: Meeting 'Share-a-Thons'

Need to get out of the house for a bit and see some friendly sober faces? Recovery support group meeting marathons run 24/7 from Christmas Eve through New Year's Day.

Swim Tuff movie poster

'Swim Tuff: How I Swam My Way Out of the Bottle' | All Sober Movie Night

Coming out of severe alcohol addiction, Ben Tuff barely knew how to swim. Ten years later, he makes a bold attempt to traverse the Narragansett Bay, taking on 24 miles of ocean in one day.

New Report

Close